The Devil Inside

The Devil Inside is the name of the movie Salinger and I choose to watch this weekend with my wife  and R. Anyway we were late so caught the 11:40 showing of the movie. Why is this pertinent to know? Because dear reader there we’re four other movies showing at the same or roughly the same time. That should have been the first sign. The second sign should have been when my id got stuck in my wallet and even though everyone is older than me I had to show my id. Pftt.. thir d sign should have been when we got our movie tickets handed too us, they gave us  Mission Impossible 4  tickets. We should have taken his que, movie sucks watch this instead.  Although Twilight and its franchise take the cake in horrible and well there are a few that beat it in stupid (Paranormal Franchise anyone?) It was abysmal. I think I laughed more than I was frightened. Plus the end was super stupid, the premise was predictable. The plot goes like this, in the beginning we are shown the police footage of the discovery of the three murders Maria Rossi committed, and then they fast forward some years to Isabella Rossi who wants to know what really lead her mother to commit those atrocious attacks. Turns out her father who is now dead, revealed to her that she had an exorcism and that this is the reason why she is now in an insane asylum in Rome.  She is on team documentation with Michael who hopes to get good footage. They go to visit Isabella’s mom and get some footage of her acting funky, but mostly like a crazy person not like a possessed person.  They leave after Isabella’s mother gets agitated and angry. They attend some classes and come into contact with two priests who preform exorcism without the Holy See’s blessing or approval.  Isabella wants them to study her mother’s case and help her solve the riddle. … I already got tired of this plot… blah, blah , blah… the priest named Tom gets possessed after performing the exorcism because he is the most vulnerable, he almost drowns a baby during its baptism  (talk about traumatizing). When he gets home he cuts his veins and then as the cops come looking for him he disarms one and takes his gun and offs himself. The demon goes to Isabella who is taken to the hospital for shock and then kills a nurse. The other priest and Michael steal Isabella and they are taking her somewhere to perform a rushed exorcism. However in the car Isabella goes demon on their asses and they crash…. Let’s just say there is going to be a part two.  Oh and mark my words it will have something to do with Fr. Ben’s uncle and how he prolly killed him .. Well it will be about him no doubt. Apart from the obvious problems with this movie including the bad ending, the decidedly shoddy camera work, the less than thrilling scenes and the too obvious plot this movie wasn’t all bad. It could have stared Kristen Stewart! Furthermore what the fuck is up with the posters with the scary nun? She didn’t have more than 2 seconds of screen time and it was really stupid to put her as poster (actually good marketing strategy but false advertising.) ….. Let’s just say this movie fell way below par.

Man in the Dark

Man in the Dark by Paul Auster, was one of the novels that my friend E, had let me borrow and let me just say that I loved it. The plot is about a man who in his old age has lost the love of his life, is living with his recently divorced daughter and his grieving granddaughter. He has insomnia and to keep his thoughts at harbor he tells himself stories to make the time go quicker. He lies in his bed and attempts to make time fly, by creating another world, another him and another life.  In his other world things changed and time because circumstantial. In the daytime he is spared from his thoughts and focuses his energy on his granddaughter as they watch foreign films and she loses herself into the stories to escape her pain. The story is told from first person point of view and Auster delivers something beautiful in a very short, but moving novel. This book is about what happens when you’re left alone in the dark with your thoughts, with nothing to distract you from the realness of life but your own imagination.  How when you’re at this point in your life the only thing you want is comfort, someone to love and to share happiness and sadness and the realness of life.

I read this book because E asked me too. Now I’m going to read it again because I simply loved it. I  even asked Salinger to put aside her book projects for the moment and read this, because it’s simply beautiful. I love that its short and told in a Kiss of the Spider Woman way. Incorporated with snippets of a different story in one interwoven delicate beauty, where realism and fantasy coexist harmoniously. Best of all I love the idea of being to give you a full plot summary without spoiling any of it. There are still many surprises left. I absolutely loved it and think everyone should read it.  Especially considering that I had to read Girl with the Curious Hair I had lost some trust in E's reading prefereces but I came out with a huge smile and glad she lent it to me. 

The truth of housewives.

What I learned today is mainly this:
People who are bored and are of a certain age will do either/or of the following: clean or exercise. Or both. Unless your OCD, one's room should be a little messy, not pristine. God I'm one bored son-of- a bitch........

The Golden Globes Fashion

So, this Sunday was awards week over in HOLLYWOOD. This is like every fashionistas Christmas, of course we all love the awards show blah, blah, blah. But what really gets me going is the red carpet. This weekend  I positioned myself in my comfy blue couch, my notepad, diet coke and my kettle cooked chips on the ready as I jotted down what I believed to be the best and worst of the night and later compare them to the Fashion Police Monday night on E!.  Let me tell you right now that the big thing was nudes and blush colored gowns… it’s pretty but considering that it’s the time you want to pop nudes without sparkles … let’s not.  Although some really rocked it like, my favorite of the whole event Charlize Theron, she looked fucking gorgeous, in second place was Resse Witherspoon, who went from girl-next door cuteness too fucking va-va voom status. The reason I picked Charlize was mainly because she made that dress, which I had some problems with, look like it was perfect.  

Charlize Theron

Reese Witherspoon

The worst of the night in my opinion was Lea Michele. I have huge problems with this girls posing, she goes out of the way to like stick her huge shoulder out and make herself kind of concave so her butt is comically out, it’s like shes trying to get the JLO butt , yet everyone can see that girl you just don’t have that ass.. who you lying too girl!! Also she couldn’t pull the dress off, it was way too, “I’m- a -sexy -tv -star –that- needs- to –be- taken- more -seriously” kind  of look. Sarah Michelle Gellar you were the fashion icon of the 90's, wth? This is what happens when you let your young under the age of five daughter pick your dress. Don't let this happen to you again.  Those were the worst of the night. 

Lea Michele and her fucking shoulder ....brrr

Sarah Michelle Gellar

Angelina Jolie looked fucking beautiful, hate her. Evan Rachel Wood, whose fashion choices I usually attempt to defend, damn she let me down so bad so no more of her and I think that both Tilda Swinton and Nicole Kidman made valiant and decent choices, so to the next award and show and to more celebrity dress bashing time. Although seriously, I want to see them do better I know they can, stay true to your sense of fashion and you will undoubtedly be able to be like Angelina,  you can wear practically anything and never be worst dressed nominee.. leave it to Lea Michele. 

Blackberry Fury!

Hello, Blackberry! I got blogger mobile...fear my posts of fury!

Insidious ( the movie) and the UPS guy.

Ok, here’s the scene:

Salinger and I have just finished lunch and we're sitting in the living room watching Insidious.  *Side note: If you haven't seen insidious please do, I am always on the hunt for the perfect scary movie and although I am extremely frightened of "The Moth man Prophecies" with Richard Gere and Laura Linney (don't ask me why I wouldn’t give you a reasonable answer. )  Anyway we’re at this scene where the mom, the dad and the grandma are sitting at the kitchen table discussing why they are so frightened or whatever and on the side of the dad’s head a demon’s face fucking pops out… omfg. *resume scene*

Salinger and I jump because we are so freaked out by this random floating head, and my parents room door makes a funky noise, me being paranoid I get up to close it. As I am walking past my front door, the eerie music starts to play and right when it’s about to climax, the fucking doorbell rings, I yelp and so does Salinger,  we both look at each other with nervous laughter and we hear the UPS guy who undoubtedly heard our screams, yell in a semi-anxious voice, “It’s UPS”. At which point I run to the door open it and see this bald dude giving me the strangest of faces… (what a mess I must have seemed.) and he thrust the package into my hand and walked away.

Let’s just say Insidious did its job, it creeped me right the fuck out.  Which I kind of liked, I’m going to watch it again tomorrow and enjoy being scared. But hopefully there shall be no more UPS men. 

La Linda Negra y La Puta Que Me Pario.

My friends are some of the best people on this planet but today i have come to believe that one of them might seriously be thinking of murdering me in ... literature. Last year, about a week ago I stopped by my friend E, house. She is an accomplished published writer in Argentina and she is into the whole new literary movement, that I'm too young or too stupid (or both)to know of or have heard of. Anyway on this little trip she told me, her words exactly "Martuchis, you have to read these authors, estan *obscene geture* escuchame, the next time I see you, you tell me what you think ok". So these are the books, The Corrections by Jonathon Franzen , Underworld by Dom DeLillo, Infinite Jest and The Girl with the Curious Hair both by David Foster Wallace. Lets just say I did not know what I was getting myself into. I got home and happily ordered these books from the Library, as I was browsing the bn.com bargain bin, I found The Corrections, waiting for me like a whore to its pimp. So, I promptly bought it. Keep in mind when I left E's home I was reading Drinking with Strangers  by Butch Walker and about to start Clash of Kings by George R. R. Martin. Well I finished the Walker biography and am currently about  one third into Clash of Kings, which thanks to Salinger is now on my phone so i can read it when I'm away from home and keep on with the book list. Why is this pertinent to murder you ask, well heres the skinny on that bitches, The Girl with the Curious Hair being about 400 pages long is the least, hear me, the least of my worries. Clash of Kings is 600-plus pages, but I'll finish it fast considering I babysit a lot and not always at home so phone be charged! Now let me give you page count,
 The Corrections: 583pgs
Underworld:900
Infinite Jest: 1000
The Girl with the Curious Hair: 400
plus I also got a b&n gift card and because I'm a cheapskate about how much I'm willing to pay for my collectors items I made 20 dollars go far, I think I have five dollars left and bought six books so far. Yay me!
The Devil Wears Prada  by Lauren Weisberger
Mad Libs...
A book that shall remain nameless.. Salinger you shush...
Hell by Robert Olen Butler
The Power of Myth by Joseph Campbell.
Note the difference in the literary works? Yeah well when I come out of this literary frenxy you guys will be the first to find out if i have completly gone insane. Last year I was in a reading funk, I just couldn't commit to a book, except for the "Song of Fire and Ice" series and the "Millenium Trilogy" and some classic here and there. So here's a chin chin to a new year full of a lot of words. Hey at least it's good blog material. To my sanity, Chin chin, oopaa, salud, salute and all that jazz.. La puta que me pario.