Day 14 : In the Heat of the Night

In the Heat of the Night: 1967: Winner of the 40th Academy Awards

Starring:

Sidney Poitier as Detective Virgil Tibbs

Rod Steiger as Police Chief Bill Gillespie

Warren Oates as Sergeant (Patrolman) Sam Wood

Lee Grant as Mrs. Leslie Colbert

Larry Gates as Eric Endicott

James Patterson as Lloyd Purdy (Delores' brother)

William Schallert as Mayor Webb Schubert

Beah Richards as Mama Caleba (aka Mrs. Bellamy)

Peter Whitney as CPL. George Courtney

Kermit Murdock as H.E. Henderson (banker)

Larry D. Mann as Watkins

Quentin Dean as Delores Purdy

Anthony James as Ralph Henshaw (diner counterman)

Arthur Malet as Ted Ulam (mortician)

Scott Wilson as Harvey Oberst (murder suspect)

Matt Clark as Packy Harrison

Eldon Quick as Charlie Hawthorne (photographer)

Jester Hairston as Henry (Endicott's butler)
 

Here’s the thing, I really hate to watch movies where there is an “I hate you but have to live with you” sort of relationship, because I feel its an overused copout. However in this case I think it seems to work. The dynamic of the relationship between the two main characters in this movie, chiefly being, Virgil Tibbs and Bill Gillespie. Officer Bill is the new sheriff and has a fresh murder on his hands. Sergeant Tibbs is  #1 in homicide in his department back home in Philadelphia, what separates these two men from embracing each other as fellow officers of the law? Race, the color of their skins, however through this they have to find the real killer and they make friends. Isn’t that nice? It was kind of annoying, to watch Tibbs attempt to get manhandeled by annoying racist dudes, but his accuracy and his efficiency and that slap on the richest white man in the land, is worth watching this movie. I can’t count it as one of my favorites, but definitely one I don’t regret watching. I should also mention that Portier was set to win, he had another movie for best picture running against it, “Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner”, and it also won out “The Graduate”  and “Bonnie and Clyde”.

It also won awards for:

Academy Award for Best Actor – Rod Steiger

Academy Award for Film Editing – Hal Ashby

Academy Award for Best Sound – Samuel Goldwyn Studios

Academy Award for Writing Adapted Screenplay – Stirling Silliphant

Day 13: An American in Paris

An American in Paris: 1951: Winner of the 24th academy Awards

Starring:

Gene Kelly as Jerry Mulligan

Leslie Caron as Lise Bouvier

Oscar Levant as Adam Cook

Georges Guétary as Henri "Hank" Baurel

Nina Foch as Milo Roberts

What to say about yet another musical? I didn’t like this one quiet so much as I like every other musical. I am in generally a fan of all movies musically inclined, but An American in Paris was far below expectation. Firstly it had thee most ridiculous plot lines ever! Some painter dude is randomly picked up by an artisan collector, but falls in love with a perfume sales-lady and some 3, 17 minute dance sequence later they are relinquished to fall in love together, happy forever and ever? Please! Furthermore, I saw Leslie Caron in another Academy Picture “Gigi” and she was like wayyy prettier. In this movie I swear I thought she was an alien, those teeth were protruding put of her tiny mouth and her eyes so slanted and wide at the same time it was like alienish and her hair was butchered, I didn’t like the way she looked and think they should have tried harder to make her look prettier. The dance numbers were incredible but not worth the time to watch, the movie “The Red Shoes” is a particularly a beautiful movie with much better dance sequences. Sidenote, this movie won “A Streetcar Named Desire”, why academy why? You failed me when you choose Hamlet over last said movie but this is beyond an oversight this is glitz and glam over talent!

 

It also won awards for:
 
 

Academy Award for Best Art – Set Decoration, Color: E. Preston Ames, Cedric Gibbons, F. Keogh Gleason, and Edwin B. Willis

Academy Award for Best Cinematography, Color: John Alton and Alfred Gilks

Academy Award for Best Costume Design, Color: Orry-Kelly, Walter Plunkett, and Irene Sharaff

Academy Award for Best Musical Score: Saul Chaplin and Johnny Green

Academy Award for Best Writing, Scoring and Screenplay: Alan Jay Lerner

Day 12: Driving Miss Daisy

Driving Miss Daisy: 1989: Winner of the 62nd Academy Awards

Starring: 

Morgan Freeman as Hoke Colburn


Jessica Tandy as Daisy Werthan

Dan Aykroyd as Boolie Werthan

Patti LuPone as Florine Werthan

Esther Rolle as Idella

Joann Havrilla as Miss McClatchley

William Hall, Jr. as Oscar

Muriel Moore as Miriam

Sylvia Kaler as Beulah

 

Yes ma’am this movie was boring. I am seriously starting to doubt all the movies from the 80’s. First “Rain Man” came along and bored me too tears and then this. Look don’t get me wrong I can see why this might have been a contender but listen to this and tell me if it sounds far-fetched; a southern white Jewish woman, (that alone sounds weird ) and a smiling African American befriend each other, out of shear boredom and the product is an award winning movie? Plus the competition was pretty stiff that year, how do you say no to “The Dead Poet’s Society”?  Look man you have got to be kidding me! Star Wars was a much better movie; it was Macbeth in outer space! I love Morgan Freeman, the man has the voice of God (literally) but I winced to see him in this movie. Playing the stereotypical 50’s black guy and to top it off he did this weird pucker like mouth movement that I just found irritating. Furthermore toward the end of the movie, when he and is 37 year-old granddaughter are driving to the house his eyes look gigantic behind those damn glasses and I couldn’t stop laughing. It was sooo funny and from then on I couldn’t take the movie seriously. I will say that in its benefit it’s a pretty short movie which I love. I guess if you want to learn where actors took their stereotypical 50’s southern drawl and whatever look no further than Driving Miss Daisy. And the timeline is so fucked up because it’s not definitive, only makeup helps you deduce what the fuck is going on. Furthermore, it also proves my theory that the more you want someone to die the longer they shall stay alive, Miss Daisy practically gets to live into her 100’s.. I have 8 more 80’s films to go and I predict that I will find something stereotypical to today’s society in them. 

It also won awards for:

Best Actress: Jessica tandy

Best Make-up

Best Adapted Screenplay

Day 11: Hamlet

Hamlet : 1948: winner of the 21st Academy Awards

Starring:

 Basil Sydney as King Claudius.

Eileen Herlie as Queen Gertrude.

Laurence Olivier as Hamlet,

Norman Wooland as Horatio.

Felix Aylmer as Polonius,

 Terence Morgan as Laertes,

 Jean Simmons as Ophelia.

To watch or not to watch? TO NOT WATCH! First off, the fucking box lied to me. I always check the back of the dvd case to inquire the length of said dvd and it said 1:33:1. Let me tell you right now that was a falsehood. It was more like 2:33:1, which was and hour more than it needed to be. Now I have seen (Sir) Laurence Olivier in “The Prince and the Showgirl” and he was rigid and cold as ever. I have problems with his snootiness, because he is a Shakespearean actor and blah, blah, blah, but this was beyond that. I was bored throughout the entirety of it, well except for when the ghost came out. That was actually pretty cool. I was tempted to take it out and say fuck it I’ll wiki it and then pretend I watched it, but I can’t really cheat, as it would be kind of ridiculous, so I watched it and died a little. Even though I have always wanted to see exact Shakespeare on video, I never expected this monstrosity. I also believe that it was nominated because America couldn’t turn down Shakespeare even though it was dreadfully boring and might I say overly dramatic, hey what the hell do I know, my suggestion is however , watch it if you abso-fuckin-lutely have too, for no other reason should thine bright eyes witness it.

It also won awards for:

Best Costume Design, Black-and-White

Roger Furse

Best Costume Design, Black-and-White

Roger Furse

Best Costume Design, Black-and-White: Roger Furse

Best Art Direction-Set Decoration, Black-and-White: Roger Furse,Carmen Dillon

Best Actor in a Leading Role: Laurence Olivier

Day 8: The Great Ziegfeld

The Great Ziegfeld:1936:Winner of the 9^th Academy Awards

Starring:

William Powell as Florenz Ziegfeld, Jr.

Myrna Loy as Billie Burke

Luise Rainer as Anna Held

Frank Morgan as Jack Billings

Fanny Brice as Herself

Virginia Bruce as Audrey Dane

Reginald Owen as Sampson, Flo's frequently-nervous bookkeeper

Ray Bolger as Himself

Ernest Cossart as Sidney, Billing's valet, who is hired away by Flo

Joseph Cawthorn as Dr. Ziegfeld

Nat Pendleton as Eugen Sandow

Harriet Hoctor as Herself

Jean Chatburn as Mary Lou

Paul Irving as Erlanger, Billing's later partner

Herman Bing as Costumer

Buddy Doyle as Eddie Cantor

The Great Ziegfeld is a stunning masterpiece! I truly mean it! I was so awed by the stage show that I wish I had a transport machine to take me to the 20’s and be present to one of his shows. The Ziegfeld Follies and to have been able to see them in their hayday! Ahh what a wish, however I could have done without the back story. Ziegfeld going up, Ziegfeld coming down… blah blah blahitty blah. I did like Fannie Brice’s bit though she was funny. Truthfully this is  the movie I thought I would like best from the three and since one I haven’t seen and one I think is kind of awesome “The Broadway Melody” I say watch this only for the shows. Skip the talking and the politics … unless you like to be bored. What I can also say is this, half of the “Wizard of Oz” is in the movie. The Wizard Oz, The  Scarecrow, and The Good Witch of the North. But seriously, this film bleh!

It also won awards for:

Academy Award for Best Actress - Luise Rainer

Academy Award for Best Dance Direction - Seymour Felix - For "A Pretty Girl Is Like a Melody".

Day 7: The Broadway Melody

The Broadway Melody:1929: Winner of the 2^nd Academy Award

Starring:

Charles King  as Eddie Kearns

Anita Page as Queenie Mahoney

Bessie Love as Harriet (Hank) Mahoney

Today was the first time I  have seen a movie that old since “Diary of a Lost Girl”, it was pretty good. The plot since I know most people won’t bother to watch , is about two sisters in the era of the two-bit sister act. Hank the older sister is more talented than Queenie but not half as pretty. They are in New York to make it big in the city. Eddie, Hank’s boyfriend, has promised them promising spots, considering he is a sing and dance guy. Zenfield, the head of the department is enchanted by Queenie’s beauty and is happy tp put her in the show despite her lack of talent. Hank has the talent but not the face and is dismissed by Zenfield, however Quenie talks him into hiring them both, so he agrees. Eddie has fallen in love with Queenie and she with him, but they do not dare to carry on with their love because it would hurt Hank. Queenie was raised by Hank and so she knows how disastrous this may seem to her. To dissuade her feelings she starts to go out with a “stage door Johnny” named Jock Wernier. The tension rises because Queenine and Eddie are always fighting about Jock and Hank gets thrown in the middle. After the shows first performance a couple of weeks later Hank realizes that her sister and her fiancé have the hots for each other and decides to step down and let them be happy. A couple of months later, they are seen coming back from their honeymoon and they insist that Hank live with them (as if pfft.) and she politely declines. The last scene is split between Queenie telling Eddie that she is sad that Hank never catches a break and that she took him from her. The other half is Hank in the train car looking dejected but trying to motivate herself.

So this movie was good but fuck that bitch Queenie. I hate her. How dare she steal her sister’s man! How could she, I know the saying goes, “the heart wants what it wants,” but goddamn , Hank has given Queenie everything and Queenie took it away . Her spot in the show, her man  and her chance at happiness. Come on, can Hank please meet a fabulous guy to make up for what Queenie has done! Why is it that its ok for a decent looking girl to lose the love of her life to the prettier girl? I really was burned by that, and I hated Eddie for not being able to look beyond the looks and for falling in love with the “kind and gentle beauty.” *Sigh* It was totally unfair and I have a slight with Queenie, and Hank wasa bigger person for forgiving them and for allowing their love to blossom. I just wish that she had some recompense in return, you know. I liked it well enough the songs are annoyingly catchy,(although not as catchy as a Bollywood song)  and the dance numbers are supreme.  Furthermore it kind of reminds you of a lighter hearted Chicago. Although shit, Vilma Kelly had it right .. do the crime, do the time but get even. 

Day 6: The English Patient

The English Patient:1996: Winner of the 69^th Academy Awards

Starring:

Ralph Fiennes as Count László Almásy

Juliette Binoche as Hana

Willem Dafoe as David Caravaggio

Kristin Scott Thomas as Katharine Clifton

Naveen Andrews as Kip

Colin Firth as Geoffrey Clifton

Julian Wadham as Madox

Jürgen Prochnow as Major Muller

Kevin Whately as Sgt. Hardy

Clive Merrison as Fenelon-Barnes

Salinger and I had wanted to see this film since, well her since she found out that Ralph Fiennes was in it and myself, since I found it on Netflix. However it wasn’t until today and the verdict is, I loved it!!It made me cry and the love story was amazing. The story centers around a burned man found in the Desert after WW2, in this garrison a nurse named Hana tries to nurse him back to health. She has lost everyone she loved and is taking upon herself to save this man, this English Patient. They find an abandoned monastery in the Italian countryside and use it as a place for him to get better. A couple of nights later we meet Moose, David Caravaggio, who was someone that the English Patient knew in a past life, the life he cannot now remember or does not wish too. This is how the love story between Mrs. Clifton and Count de Almasy is told. Through flashback we get a glimpse of the man who was burned and heartbroken. This was a really good, albeit long, movie. I truly enjoyed it and was glad to watch. Yesterday I was complaining about overused love plots and today I find myself rekindled in that belief. Even though it was tragic and sad and I ended up with my eyes watering, I also found myself thinking that love is really all that drives human condition. Without love there is no life. It is life that brings the profound sense of belonging and acceptance that humans need. Yes, I got all that from watching this movie. Because when Hana the nurse is telling the English Patient that she wants to make him better he says that he prefers to leave this world as has his beloved. The movie was really good, I recommended that everyone watch it.

It also won awards for:

Best Actress in a Supporting Role: Juliette Binoche

 Best Art Direction-Set Decoration : Stuart Craig and Stephanie McMillan

 Best Cinematography  : John Seale

 Best Costume Design : Ann Roth

 Best Director :Anthony Minghella

Best Film Editing :Walter Murch

Best Original Score :Gabriel Yared

Best Sound :Walter Murch, Mark Berger, David Parker, and Christopher Newman

Day 5: West Side Story

West Side Story: 1961: Winner of the 34^th Academy Awards

Starring:

Natalie Wood (Marni Nixon, singing) – Maria Nunez

Richard Beymer (Jimmy Bryant, singing) – Tony Wycek,

 Russ Tamblyn – Riff Lorton,

Rita Moreno (Betty Wand, singing) – Anita,

George Chakiris – Bernardo Nunez

Simon Oakland – Lieutenant Schrank,

Ned Glass – Doc,

William Bramley – Officer Krupke,

John Astin – Glad Hand

Penny Santon – Madam Lucia

The Jets:

Tucker Smith – Ice,

Tony Mordente – Action,

Eliot Feld – Baby John

David Winters – A-Rab

Bert Michaels – Snowboy

David Bean – Tiger

Robert Banas – Joyboy

Anthony 'Scooter' Teague – Big Deal

Harvey Hohnecker – Mouthpiece

Tommy Abbott – Gee-Tar

Jet Girls:

Susan Oakes – Anybodys

Gina Trikonis – Graziella

Carole D'Andrea – Velma, Ice's girl

Rita Hyde d'Amico – Clarice, Big Deal's girl

Pat Tribble – Minnie, Baby John's girl

Francesca Bellini – "Cool" dancer

Elaine Joyce – dancer

Sharks:

Jose DeVega – Chino Martin

Jay Norman – Pepe

Gus Trikonis – Indio

Eddie Verso – Juano

Jamie Rogers – Loco

Larry Roquemore – Rocco

Robert E. Thompson – Luis

Nick Covacevich – Toro

Rudy Del Campo – Del Campo

Andre Tayir – Chile

Shark Girls:

Yvonne Othon – Consuela

Suzie Kaye – Rosalia

Joanne Miya – Francisca

West Side Story is based on Shakespeare’s classic Romeo and Juilet, however he is substituting warring families with warring nations. The Jets are the rough and tumble low bred Whites, the Sharks the newly exported Puerto Ricans. The story is set in the 50’s a very tense and racial time in America’s history and of course one member of each the warring countries people falls inevitably in love with each other. I wish I had watched this movie when I was younger. That way I wouldn’t be so hard on it, even thought it was lovely and I can’t stop singing that damn “Tonight ,Tonight” song , I think it might have lacked something. Maybe I just don’t like gang movies because they frustrate me, or maybe the false accents were really starting to grind against my Hispanic ego, hell if I know the right reason, it just wasn’t all that amazing plot wise to me. However the dance numbers were worth the watch all on their own. I soo wanna dance like that on a New York building now! I love Natalie Wood, ever since I saw her in “Sex and the Single Girl”, and West Side Story almost made me think, eh she’s not that great, until the last scene which was the saving grace. If you’re going to watch the movie watch it for the dancing, the songs, for the love story and try to watch it before you’ve watched some of other greatest love stories. I will say this though; this would be great on Broadway.

It has also won awards for:

Academy Award for Best Supporting Actor – George Chakiris

Academy Award for Best Supporting Actress – Rita Moreno

Academy Award for Best Art Direction – Victor A. Gangelin and Boris Leven

Academy Award for Best Cinematography – Daniel L. Fapp

Academy Award for Best Costume Design– Irene Sharaff

Academy Award for Best Director – Jerome Robbins and Robert Wise

Academy Award for Best Film Editing – Thomas Stanford

Academy Award for Best Original Score – Saul Chaplin, Johnny Green, Irwin Kostal, and Sid Ramin

Academy Award for Best Sound – Fred Hynes and Gordon E. Sawyer 

Day 4: Rain Man

Rain Man: 1988: Winner of the 61^st Academy Awards.

Starring:

Tom Cruise  as Charlie Babbit

Dustin Hoffman as Raymand Babbit

Valeria Golino as Susanna

Gerald R. Molen as Dr. John Brunner

The story is about a selfish, conceited,  egotistical asshole named  Jerry Maguire  ohh I mean Charlie Babbitt. His father dies and he is found in the position of being exorcised of the will, which is 3 million dollars’ worth of estate. Babbitt finds out that it belongs to his newly discovered half-brother Raymond Babbitt. Raymond is autistic and has been living in a mental institution for nigh on twenty years. He moved in two years after Charlie was born and right after their mother died.  Wanting to attain half of Raymond’s money he kidnaps him and in exchange asks for 1.5 million dollars. On this road trip Charlie finds himself growing fonder r of Raymond, especially in this one scene in the bathroom, where they are brushing Ray’s teeth. In one of the beginning scene s  Charlie tells his girlfriend that when he was little the “rain man” would come to sing to him when he got scared. During this brushing of the teeth scene, Raymond tells him that he C-H-A-R-L-I-E was scared and that not to fear, that the “rain man” would come to sing to him. Btw it wasn’t till then I got the title of the movie. Moving on Ray has an uncanny ability to know the exact amount of something if he takes one quick look at it, he is very good with numbers. This prompts Charlie who is having monetary issues to go to Vega s and makes some quick bucks. They win 85,500 dollars and Ray goes on his first date. Then they come back to LA and Charlie realizes that he really does love Ray and doesn’t want to lose him. However the morning episode proves that he doesn’t qualify to be Ray’s protector so he gives Dr. Brunner back custody of Ray. ]

Alright, alright the movie was pretty good, but it also made me remember why I hate Tom Cruise, he is such a cocky little butt wipe. Excusing him in “Interview with a Vampire” , I just can’t stomach him. However the movie was way easier to watch than the previous night’s pick. And it made me cry, wait never mind that was yawning tears. I checked the competition and yeah it was the best 1988 could offer. So watch it if you’re going to compare to Forrest Gump and Radio but don’t expect too much. After all its an 80’s film.

It also won awards for:

Best Actor in a Leading Role (Dustin Hoffman)

Best Director: Barry Levinson

 Best Writing, Original Screenplay: Barry Morrow and Ronald Bass

Day 3: Lawrence of Arabia

Lawrence of Arabia: 1963: 33rd Winner of the Academy Award


Starring:



Peter O'Toole as Thomas Edward "T. E." Lawrence. 
Alec Guinness as Prince Faisal. 
Anthony Quinn as Auda abu Tayi. 
Jack Hawkins as General Allenby. 
Omar Sharif as Sherif Ali ibn el Kharish
José Ferrer as the Turkish Bey. 
Anthony Quayle as Colonel Harry Brighton. 
Claude Rains as Mr. Dryden. 
Donald Wolfit as General Murray. 
Michel Ray as Farraj. 
I.S. Johar as Gasim. 
Zia Mohyeddin as Tafas. 
John Dimech as Daud. 
Fernando Sancho as the Turkish sergeant. 
Jack Gwillim as the club secretary.
Harry Fowler as Corporal Potter
Howard Marion-Crawford as the medical officer. 
Norman Rossington as Corporal Jenkins
Jack Hedley as a reporter


Today I spent about four hours on the most ridiculously long movie ever! Perhaps because I didn't want to watch it in the first place, maybe that's why I really didn't like it. Lets start with problem number 1: the length, unlike some of the other classic masterpieces i.e. "Gone with the Wind"  who have unforgettable lines and unforgettable moments, this movie had neither. Number 2, unnecessary shots of the desert and prolonging unnecessary. for example the whole crossing of the Nefud could have been more interesting if it wasn't thirty minutes long. Number 3, it had a good score but all the characters were gigantic asswipes including Lawerence himself. Call me crazy but how did this movie beat "How to Kill a Mockingbird"? Maybe it won for "Longest Picture EVER".   *Sigh*, maybe I just hate war movies, maybe I didn't understand the whole premise, hey I am not Roger Ebert and am entitled therefore to say this movie ... not to my liking. It was boring, but I will say this the music was beautiful and I am considering buying the soundtrack for it. My opinion, don't bother watching this movie, unless you've accepted a challenge such as this. 


It has also won awards for:



Best Director: David Lean 
Best Art Direction: John Box, John Stoll and Dario Simoni
Best Cinematography: Frederick A. Young
Best Substantially Original Score: Maurice Jarre
Best Film Editing: Ann V. Coates
Best Sound: John Cox

Day 1: One Flew over the Cuckoo's Nest

One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest : 1975: Winner of the 48^th Academy Awards 1976

Starring:

Jack Nicholson as Randle McMurphy

Louise Fletcher as Nurse Ratched

William Redfield as Dale Harding

Will Sampson as "Chief" Bromden

Brad Dourif as Billy Bibbit

Sydney Lassick as Charlie Cheswick

Danny DeVito as Martini

Christopher Lloyd as Max Taber

Dean R. Brooks as Dr. John Spivey

William Duell as Jim Sefelt

Vincent Schiavelli as Frederickson

Delos V. Smith as Scanlon

Michael Berryman as Ellis

Nathan George as Attendant Washington

Lan Fendors as Nurse Itsu

Mimi Sarkisian as Nurse Pilbow

Mews Small as Candy

Scatman Crothers as Orderly Turkle

Louisa Moritz as Rose

The movie is about Randall, a convicted man who is deemed deranged and mentally ill, as he tries to free himself and the other patients from the authoritarian rule of the bitchy evil head nurse. In the process he forms a bond and friendship with “Chief” a man who is deaf and dumb therefore mute. He tries to break all the prisoners free but his last romp and subsequent desire to flee go wrong and he gets punished for it. In the end however through his act of courage he inspires “Chief” to be as “big as a mountain” and he is free.

Ok, so I skipped a lot of the plot but trust me when I say there is no better way of watching a movie than not knowing what is going to happen. I had had this movie on my Netflix queue for a while now and never really wanted to watch it, even when my wifey said it was the shits. However now that I did I don’t regret it at all. It was everything I thought it would be and more. I was really sad when one of the prisoner’s comes back with a lobotomy, and it got me thinking that the human race is really cruel. Not like I didn’t know, it was just something else to see it captured on camera. I was so tearing up and in the end I was rooting for Chief to be free! Be free! I can now understand why it won an Oscar. It was a depiction of the institutionalization of the deranged and how unfairly they were mistreated. Very good film!

It also won awards for :

Best Director : Miloš Forman

Best Leading Actor: Jack Nichoson (does crazy good)

Best Leading  Actress: Louise Fletcher  (does angry bitch good)

Best Writing (Adapted Screenplay)

Challenge: Accepted!

In light of my current loser status, I have decided to undertake a challenge. Watch all the academy award winning films. There are currently 83 in like two weeks it shall be 84, so let us say 84. The goal is to watch one every day and then write a blog. I shall give myself exactly 84 days. Wait, considering I’m always going to visit my grandma, I shall extend to a full 100. This will be enough time to watch them all and still have a semblance of a life. Why am I doing this, you ask. Simple. I am obsessed with films, I collect films, movies. I want to watch everything that’s ever received an award, simply because I trust they have to be spectacular to win an award. There have been a couple on the list I have already watched so I have cut it down some. But I have also decided to watch them again in case I can’t get one of the ones on the list. So , tis all wish me luck Arvoir!=]

SAG Awards Fashion

Sunday was another of Downtown, Los Angeles busy days, with the ceremony of the SAG awards. The awards were ablaze with the rich and the famous who were all trying to get a little piece of the naked male, commonly known as “The Actor”. The Shrine Auditorium where it was held found itself a prime dot in a grid of interconnected traffic  hot spots. But enough of the little traffic rant, here now are the nominees. But first an epilogue.

My dear readers you all know how I obsessed I am with all things Hollywood and its fashion. Well this year’s SAG’s were no exception. Excuse the delay but I had some family matters and didn’t have the available necessities to write this review, but now I do so here goes. My overall verdict of this year’s SAG fashion: bleh. Not too amazing. I think the globes had a better fashion sense. Everything was at a par. Furthermore I saw the Fashion Police show coverage and I think they have put Joan Rivers on some Novocain or given her a lifetime supply of free Botox. Seriously wtf Joan, I like your raunchy cutthroat style and lack of sympathy for the ill-dressed. During the SAG awards I felt she let me down. Joan if you ever read this listen to me, get mean or get lost in your Botox crypt bitch. We don’t mess around! Ok resuming convo the nights best dressed were three:

Viola Davis: the dress was fucking stunning, not only did she win a SAG award but she also won my pick for best dressed, the color made her look (not in a lesbian way) delicious. She is 46 but she looks like she’s late 30’s. And hello boobs!! The dress just fit and hugged in all the right places. Plus the contrast with her skin was magnificent. The makeup was great and the hair was perfection.  Sidenote; she had glowing skin, I think she put on some glitter but instead of looking tacky she looked hot!

Julie Bowen: Girlfriend looked hot! She was wearing a fuschia dress that was just va-vavoom! I loved it and thought that not only was it age appropriate it also strangely made her look a lot younger. The hair matched and so did the make-up which is always a plus. Moreover, she accentuated something underappreciated in Hollywood, her butt! And a very nice long sleek back. Go Julie Bowen, also it isn’t easy to wear the same color as your co-star who is renowned for her bosom and still look better than her. (Sofia Vergara, I talking to you.)

Octavia Spencer: You, homegurl shit in a pie and looks like a bajillion dollars. Let me just tell you that her dress was flawless. The sleeves were proportionate to the rest of the dress and didn’t look matronly at all. The heavy lace didn’t make her look heavier, but the exact opposite making her lighter and statelier. The flowing chiffon was also really pretty to look like coming down the carpet. The color was an even match for her skin tone and it was the first time a woman with curves looked prettier, not only compared to older women or other curvy women but with thin young femmes as well. I thought she was phenomenal! 

The worst of the night are as follows:

Heathr Morris: Girl, I do not know who the fuck you are , but you is an ugly ass dresser. You know when Bai Ling calls you for fashion advice you better steer clear! I have no idea what the fuck this girl thought when she put on this shit but she must have been smoking smoothing good! I hated this dress and the hair was sick, she doesn’t have the softness for it. She could have gone in many different directions, maybe she tried to copy Amber Heard but this was a hot mess. Girl you to young to fuck up, go get changed!

Zoe Saldana: Mira chica, yo se que sos bella pero puta no seas tonta! Girl’s one of my kin, and we are so not known to be fashion rule breakers in a bad way. Look at JLO. Look at Selena Gomez and so on. Hispanics always look good! But she wore something so bad! The tank top underneath looked like she  barley realized her dress was see through and wasn’t wearing a bra and pulled into a target bought the only thing in white and put it on. Then there as the bottom although it looked pretty I couldn’t help but hate the fabric , it looked like white pleather..ewww… she can do better, she must do better.

 The worst dressed award goes too:

Shailene Woodley: Yo Amy, wtf happened? The Descendants and The Secret Life of the American Teenager (SLOAT) star, disappoints! I do not know what it is about her but she cannot stand out in the crowd. She is star potential or not young girls always make a scene but she blends. The Golden Globes dress, although bad color and bad hair was not bad. This was a catastrophe! Plus that hair was so lame, girl try a little bit harder. Wear a pink or wear a deep blue but stay away from this kind of shit. It’s not that her body now looks like she’s 50 but the hair looks like if she had had sex in a car and messed uo her do, so decided on a ponytail. Es muy malo . 

This has been the fashion show for tonight. I shall see you all at the next awards show and to no more bad dresses. Btw honoroable mentions, Angelina Jolie is so hot she should know better than to wear shit like what she wore. Emma Stone, valiant effort change the shoes. Natalie Portman, girl try a wee bit harder and stay away from things that flop.  Oh and LEa Michele is still a bloody idiot this time she wore pointy shoes with a high slit dress. Can anyone say CHUNT! Not to mention the awful posing, total eeks. The End.